Hack based this novel on his cover artist Jonny M.’s erotic descriptions of women’s libidinous response to the new floor that he had just had installed in his government-assisted housing unit. For his part, Hack knew that Jonny was full of crap but he figured that his readers in the Bible Belt would eat it up.
Sham Wedding
Happy heavenly birthday to the legendary Mary Pickford!!!
Last Tango in Van Nuys
Happy heavenly birthday to Marlon Brando!!!
Gagnet
Happy heavenly birthday to Jack Webb!!!
Tupug
Hack wrote this because he had a deadline coming up and he heard his cover artist Jonny M. joke to his pug Boris that the little dog’s favorite rapper was “Tupug.” Half an hour later, Hack had this ready for publication.
It’s not his best work.
The Ultimate Battle
Happy Easter from The Jonny Pals!!!
Senior Junior Ranger and the Passionate Pachyderm of Pepperbrook Park
Happy birthday to Bro Joe!
When Joe complained to Hack that the most popular Junior Ranger books (which are based on his adventures as an outdoorsman) depict him being sexually assaulted by wild animals on the cover, Hack decided to honor Joe’s birthday with this tale of Joe’s brother and Hack’s cover artist Jonny M. being anally raped by a bull elephant as Joe and Jonny’s pug Boris laughed their asses off. At first, Jonny refused to paint the cover art until the publisher’s lawyer threatened him with financial ruin if he declined the project.
Joe later said that it was his best birthday ever.
Nudge, Nudge
Happy birthday to Eric Idle!
The Last Outro
Happy Piano Day!
Death Scene
Happy World Theater Day!