Revenge of the Dangerous Gams
Category: Detective
Naked Vengeance
Did the Carpet Match the Drapes?
Blonde on the Run
Too Many Suspects
This is a boiler plate murder mystery that hack cranked out because he wanted to write something with a character who had a pencil-thin mustache.
Her Motive Was Lust
A gorgeous woman appears to have murdered her gorgeous roommate and hires her ex-lover Detective Jonny to solve the case. It turns out that the roommate faked her own death and the pair pinned it on Jonny, who gets as far as having the noose placed over his head on the gallows when Hack suddenly lost interest in the story and spent the last twenty pages railing against his abusive father.
The Case of the Dead Parrot
Hack is a huge fan of the great John Cleese so he crapped out this novel to determine what actually happened to the Norwegian Blue. It turned out to be a suicide.
This was the second time that Hack’s cover artist Jonny M. posted his artwork on Instagram and the celebrity subject “liked” it. The first was the great Susanna Hoffs of The Bangles opining on Hack’s horror novel “Walk Like an Egyptian.” This time, it was when the great Mr. Cleese clicked his approval of “The Case of the Dead Parrot.” Hack wants both of those acknowledgements carved on his headstone.
Return of the Dangerous Gams
Hack was dissatisfied with “Dangerous Gams and the Mystery of the Heart-Shaped Bed” and wanted to retire the series. But his readership demanded a new installment so he cranked this out during his lunch hour from his job as the night janitor of Shakey’s Pizza Parlor as a fantasy of how he imagined his shift would be when he got back from his break. His heroes spent most of their time having anal sex with the titular vamp in between scenes of them solving a mystery involving some stolen diamonds, while Hack actually spent the next few hours scraping vomit from off the Ms. Pac Man machine.
They Wanted to Sell Books
The title of this book was supposed to be “Mob Informant” but the copywriter who came up with the text for the cover took his conversation with publisher John Kane too literally and laid out this instead. Hack was angry until the new title sold three times as many copies as expected.
Dangerous Gams and The Mystery of the Heart-Shaped Bed
For the third installment of the “Dangerous Gams” saga, Hack pitted detectives Jonny and Boris against each other as Snow Mercy played a dangerous game of cat and mouse. He painted himself in the corner at the end so he took the cop-out of making it all a dream, but there was enough graphic sex to make the fans happy.