Sports and Games – HackWerker.com

Over The Line

Happy US Bowling League Day!

Korea Mullich and the Pillagers of Ted Williams’ Frozen Head

Happy heavenly birthday to Ted Williams!

Williams is most famous for two things. 1> He is arguably the greatest hitter in baseball history and 2> he had his head cryogenically frozen after his death so that it could be reanimated when the technology was available (no kidding, he really did). Hack is a huge baseball fan and also plans to have his remains frozen when he finally goes, so he wrote this novel in tribute to his hero.

Rock, Paper Scissors

Happy National Rock, Paper Scissors Day!

In this taught sports drama, Jonny’s opponents figure out his strategy in the first round, so they always play Scissors until they pound Jonny into a bloody mess. But in the final championship bout, the arrogant leader is so accustomed to forming a fist after every time he beats Jonny that he accidentally makes it too early and the referee decrees it as a Rock. Jonny is unable to enjoy his victory because he lapses into a coma just before he can get in his winning punch.

Undercover Ninja

This is a sequel to Hack’s earlier sicko novel Innocence Bound, although he managed to make it even sicker.

Volleybrawl

Hack used to go down to Venice Beach and watch pretty girls play Volleyball until they got creeped out and told him to get the hell out of there. So he went home and wrote this book instead. It’s very angry.

Sex Coach

Mystery Date

Hack has been trying to figure out a way to cash in on the trend of movies based on video games. He’s far too old to know anything about video games and he burned all his bridges to the film industry decades ago, so he wrote this novel about his favorite board game in the hopes that Hollywood notices.