Reservoir Pugs

When his cover artist Jonny M.’s pug Boris beat the living hell out of Hack for being disrespectful to his master, Hack sat down and wrote this novelization of the Quentin Tarantino film “Reservoir Dogs” with a Boris-like pug as Harvey Keitel’s character Mr. Blonde. Tarantino was going to sue but he reportedly found the whole thing so goddamned hilarious that he let it go in exchange for Hack playing the role of a Hack Werker-like pulp fiction writer in his film “Pulp Fiction,” which ultimately wound up on the cutting room floor.

Marrying Mr. Darcy

When Hack heard that his celebrity crush Frances Fisher was starring in a film with this title, he got excited and immediately rushed out this novel with the same name about a sweet girl who unknowingly marries Satan and spends eternity ruling Hell. When Ms. Fisher’s film came out and it turned out to be a charming romantic comedy/drama having nothing to do with the Prince of Darkness, Hack tried to changw the title of his book to “The Devil’s Bride” not realizing that it had already been on sale for a month with the first title but no one cared because Hack’s version was really stupid no matter what it was called