Happy heavenly birthday to the immortal Bela Lugosi!
The Fashion of Dracula
Category: Literature
The Chic Spies
Chic Spy Day, which was created by Mignon Gould of the fashion website The Chic Spy, celebrates James Bond and similar fictional chic spies of film and television. Since there are few things Hack loves more than writing James Bond rip-offs, he took advantage of the gala to crank out this hodgepodge, an almost word-for-word copy of Diamonds Are Forever that led to his biggest plagiarism lawsuit yet.
The Cheshire Pug
Happy World Smile Day!
The Hack Werker Murders
Happy National Read a Book Day!
Sleeping Jonny
No Shit, Sherlock
Hack penned this while alternately bingeing episodes of the BBC Sherlock Holmes series with Jeremy Brett, Sherlock with Benedict Cumberbatch and old Sherlock Holmes movies with Basil Rathbone while playing the storm sequence from Back to the Future on YouTube on a loop in the background, all while guzzling Jack Daniels. He doesn’t remember writing a word of it but he woke up in a pool of his own tears and vomit with the manuscript in a neat pile next to his typewriter.
Implausibility on the Orient Express
A Spoonful of Butt Cheek
The Penis and the Pendulum
After Hack wrote his Edgar Allan Poe rip-off The Tell-Tale Butt, his friend Dave Ritterband mocked “Wow! This one was even better than The Penis and the Pendulum!” Hack was outraged at the slight so he wrote a book with the title to put Ritterband in his place. But his friend was right, The Tell-Tale Butt was much better.
2024
Happy heavenly birthday to Sir John Hurt!