The website of the greatest pulp fiction writer who ever lived
Today is the Festival of Unmentionable Thoughts, which is supposed to serve as a reminder of the importance of freedom of thought and the complexities of the human psyche. The Festival of Unmentionable Thoughts celebrates the inherent human capacity for introspection and contemplation.
When Hack heard about it, he wrote one of his most disgusting novels about the foul spectres that float in his head throughout the day. It’s one of his all-time best sellers.
Hack watched the movie Wicked and loved it so much that he wrote this rip-off novel. It’s disturbingly violent.
Happy Bartender Appreciation Day! This novel is loosely based on the influence Hack had on his third wife. (If we’re being honest, all four of his wives.)
Happy National Blue Jeans Day!
We hope that you’re enjoying a wonderful start to your holiday season!
Happy birthday to the great Jenna Dewan!
When Hack saw his cover artist Jonny M.’s new Christmas tree ornament depicting evil Spock with a beard from the Star Trek episode “Mirror, Mirror,” he was fascinated; especially when Jonny explained that the episode contained his favorite line “my operatives will avenge my death…and some of them are Vulcans.” The threat was directed at evil Mr. Sulu who appeared to shit his pants at the warning, making Hack wonder exactly what evil Spock’s Vulcan operatives were capable of.
Hack provided the answer with this novel. If you seen the “Mirror, Mirror” episode and imagined what evil Spock was referring to, be warned: what’s described in the book is much worse.
When Hack heard that a pug named Vito had won the 2024 National Dog Show, he penned this novel to rub it in the face of his cover artist Jonny M. and his pug Boris. When presented the manuscript, Jonny just told him that every dog owner knew that their dog was the best dog (and they were all right about it) and Boris just peed on Hack’s shoes, sending him on s drunken bender that ended with him in county lockup for ninety days. It was all business as usual.