The website of the greatest pulp fiction writer who ever lived
This is based on yet another of Hack’s revenge scams that backfired on him. He made a list of everyone who had wronged him and then made a plan to have sex with all of them only to watch their horrified faces the next morning after they realized what they’d done. But the first person that he tried it with passed along a rare STD that caused his penis to shrink to microscopic size, where it remains to this day.
When his cover artist Jonny M. and his pug Boris saved a beautiful woman from being hit by a car, Hack was furious that she rewarded the pair (Boris with a case of Milk Bone dog biscuits, Jonny with a weekend of intense sex) instead of recognizing them as the idiots he knows them to be. Hack wrote this novel to educate the world about the truth as he sees it regarding the two.
Hack’s take on women in prison. Butt Lust Magazine called it “inarguably the finest novel ever written.”
Hack’s friend Rosanna De Candia would become a regular fixture in his novels but this one was the first that he based on her. After she read it, she hit him over the head with a monkey wrench.
This was based on a strange story his cover artist Jonny M. told Hack about a beautiful woman who couldn’t decide between Jonny and his pug Boris. She ultimately picked Boris but Boris rejected her because after all, he’s a freaking dog.
Two gorgeous women battle it out to be a mysterious stranger’s partner in anal sex. “Four stars” from Butt Lust Magazine.
A smokin’ hot babe with one leg seduces horny saps into smuggling microfilm in her spare artificial limb.
This sequel picks up where “The Slut” left off. Strangely, the title character is constantly giving men syphilis without suffering from the illness herself. When pressed about that detail, Hack testily warns you not to challenge him because he is one of the recognized greatest experts on the disease in the world. This despite that fact that he doesn’t spell it correctly anywhere in the book, including the cover.
When his celebrity crush Frances Fisher organized a movement to keep endangered wetlands developed, Hack tried to suck up to her by writing this novel in support of her work. As usual, the many graphic sex scenes horrified most civilized readers although sales skyrocketed when Oprah Winfrey raved about the book on her TV show.