Jonny & Boris Meet Columbo

Like everyone, Hack loves the old Peter Falk mystery series Columbo. But also like everybody, he couldn’t help but notice that the titular police detective solved his cases on the most slender of evidence that not only wouldn’t hold up in court; it likely wouldn’t have made it to trial. Especially since his suspects were all super-rich glitterati who could afford the finest in defense attorneys.

But the show was always fun, so we forgave it its sins. Hack’s work, by contrast, is never fun so Columbo’s methods run into a brick wall of reality and by the book’s end, he’s been kicked off the force and is serving time for violation of his defendants’ civil rights.

Jonny & Boris Meet Veronica Mars

Hack had never heard of Veronica Mars but he saw a Hot Sauce Challenge video on YouTube with Kristen Bell and he fell head-over-heels in love with her, so he wrote this mystery novel as a means of winning her heart. It only resulted in yet another restraining order being filed against him but at least it’s a pretty good read.

Some of Them Were Vulcans

When Hack saw his cover artist Jonny M.’s new Christmas tree ornament depicting evil Spock with a beard from the Star Trek episode “Mirror, Mirror,” he was fascinated; especially when Jonny explained that the episode contained his favorite line “my operatives will avenge my death…and some of them are Vulcans.” The threat was directed at evil Mr. Sulu who appeared to shit his pants at the warning, making Hack wonder exactly what evil Spock’s Vulcan operatives were capable of.

Hack provided the answer with this novel. If you seen the “Mirror, Mirror” episode and imagined what evil Spock was referring to, be warned: what’s described in the book is much worse.

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