High Five of Death

It’s National High Five Day, which prompted Hack’s cover artist Jonny M. to reminisce about a coworker he had at an old job named Nicole. Nicole was the ideal colleague in every conceivable way except that whenever there was a cause to celebrate in the office, she would reward everybody at arms length with the hardest goddamned high five that anyone’s every given you. They came on at the velocity of a speeding locomotive and sounded like a rifle shot when they met their target, sending your hand into sudden shock that would then quickly devolve into an intense throbbing pain that would stay with you for days.

Hack is always delighted at the notion of Jonny experiencing any type of suffering (physical, emotional or otherwise), so he cranked out this novel to immortalize it.

Hot Heads

Today is something called Make Your Own Head Day in which you’re supposed to make a likeness of your own head using any medium you want, such as pencils, charcoal, paint, clay, or paper mâché. Hack had a deadline approaching so he used the holiday as an inspiration to crap out this espionage novel. He would have done better to use the time to make a paper mâché model of his own head.