Category: Fantasy

The Rainbow Report

Hack’s cover artist Jonny M. has a fantasy where his pug Boris goes to the edge of the Rainbow Bridge every night to report on Jonny’s mood to his late pug Winston. When Hack heard about it, he wrote this novel. Jonny threatened a plagiarism lawsuit at first but after he read it, he decided that it was just too damned sweet to keep anyone from reading it.

Happy Rainbow Bridge Remembrance Day!

Avenging Angels

Today is something called Be An Angel Day, which inspired Hack to think about his angelic friends Glenn and Julie, and even his cover artist Jonny M.’s late pug Winston (Hack’s dementia has increased to the point where he can’t remember that he and Winston despised each other). It’s kind of a touching book.

The Family Curse

Hack’s cover artist Jonny M.’s Bro Joe wrote a typically amusing post on the social network about how he was at his headquarters of Starbucks making a phone call when he looked up to see all the aspiring screenwriters and insane hobos sharing the space angrily “shushing” him because he was talking too goddamned loudly. That was all well and good until Joe ended the post by stating that “I grew up with a brother who became an actor and asked you to “pass the peas” like he was performing at Lincoln Center. You had to shout to be heard in our house.”

It’s true that Jonny’s indoor voice is set by default to a Spinal Tap 11 and he is often told to keep it the fuck down by people having coffee in the adjoining Zip Code. However, this was the first time that Jonny could remember being blamed for someone ELSE’S vocal intensity simply by virtue of shared DNA. He had no idea that was how the universe works but the next time he experiences one of his legendary intimate dysfunctions, he’s going to lay the blame at Bro Joe’s feet…or anyway about a yard higher. There’s nothing more important than family. Now pass the peas.

Babe: The Giant Ox Who Took Giant Dumps

Hack was on a deadline and he was just finishing up a new book in honor of a beloved celebrity’s birthday, but then he realized that the celebrity’s birthday isn’t actually for two weeks, so he quickly crapped this out for Paul Bunyan Day. Then he realized that he screwed up again and that Paul Bunyan Day actually falls on the beloved celebrity’s birthday and NOT today, so he’s in back getting drunk and this is all we have to offer you. Happy Paul Bunyan Day!!!