This Jonny M. adventure was based on the exploits of Jonny’s buddy James “Tree” Cleveland, an accomplished fiddler whose serenades to the ladies got him more poon tang than Hack got in his wildest dreams.Hack got so excited after finishing it that he took his kazoo to a nearby girl’s Catholic school and played old Tony Bennett songs on the physical education field until he was dragged off by police.
Hack spent a night at his cover artist Jonny’s M.’s palatial Casa de Jonny estate in Van Nuys, California and was so impressed by the unending stream of gorgeous women who came to visit that he was convinced that Van Nuys was the erotic center of the universe. Jonny never had the heart to tell Hack that the women were there because he ran a porn studio out of his garage, so Hack maintains that opinion to this day.
This is Hack’s final book about the stern and passionate Madam Rosie. His friend Rosanna De Candia told him that she’d “slice him from neck to nuts” if he completed it, so the story stops abruptly on page 78 and the rest is filled out by a short story Hack wrote in 1959 about cross-dressers in the US Coast Guard. Strangely, no one seemed to notice.
Gorgeous prostitutes start vanishing from the city, interesting no one but the hero (who Hack had such little interest in as a character that he didn’t even give him a name) and his faithful dog. It turns out the prostitutes are being kept in a barge that will transport them to the private island of the evil warlord Vlad Werkowski (Hack’s father’s real name) where they will live out their lives as sex slaves. The prostitutes bide their time in the ship’s hull having lesbian sex until the tide turns so that they can begin their journey but just as it does, the hero and his dog creep onboard to beat the living daylights out of the crew and release the girls. The prostitutes thank him with a massive orgy.
Hack was still so turned on by the beating his friend Rosanna De Candia gave him that inspired “Madam Rosie” that when he got out of the hospital, he started annoying her so that she would do it again. The result was this novel.
Hack got in an argument with his friend Rosanna De Candia which ended in her pummeling the living hell out of him. This turned Hack on more than he could say so he wrote this book from his hospital bed.
A motorcycle gang comprised on men in their fifties ascend up a local girls high school and introduce the Valedictorian to the wonders of anal intercourse on her 18th birthday. But a gorgeous student teacher spanks the defiance out of her and when she receives an acceptance letter to Harvard on graduation day, she thanks her guardian angel with a torrid weekend of violent lesbian sex. Very loosely based on the teenage years of Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Jessie had been trouble from the jump, a lean-strung sparkplug with too much fire in her frown and too many miles on those skin-tight blue jeans. The old crowd she ran with left dents in the night—dented streetlamps, dented reputations, dented futures. But when she transferred to Good Girl High School, the town watched like it was waiting for a train wreck. They didn’t expect the plaid skirt. They didn’t expect the buzz cut. And they sure didn’t expect Jessie, the on-again, off-again menace of Sycamore Street, to rise up from the ashes of her past and snag valedictorian like it was the most natural thing in the world.
But the thing about old habits is they sit quiet only long enough to draw breath. By the time the ink dried on the letter from Harvard—fat envelope, no surprises—Jessie was already slipping back toward the shadows. And in those shadows waited Jonny M., a young hoodlum with a smile sharpened like a shiv and a talent for trouble that left even the cops muttering prayers. He wasn’t alone, either. His pug Boris padded along beside him, a squat little enforcer with a bark that carried farther than any bullet. Together they’d been terrorizing the town with their bad-boy routines, and Jessie, top of her class and golden-ticket bound, fell for Jonny like sin was gravity.
Miss Syntz noticed before anyone else. She always did. Gorgeous, yes—so much so even the PTA gossips held their breath when she walked by—but strict enough to freeze an earthquake mid-shake. She remembered Jessie’s first semester: the snarls, the confrontations, the wooden paddle hanging behind her desk like a promise. She’d had to spank the defiance out of the girl more than once, and Jessie had come out the other side something sharper, cleaner, stronger. Now Miss Syntz watched her brightest student drift back toward the abyss, and her knuckles grew white around the chalk she snapped in half.
The way Miss Syntz saw it, there was only one path left. She’d walked the straight and narrow so long it had grooves worn into her shoes, but if the only way to save Jessie’s future was to step into the gutter herself, then so be it. She’d trade her tidy bun for danger, her rulebook for recklessness, and show Jonny M. what a real bad girl looked like. And maybe—just maybe—steal him right out from under Jessie’s nose. In a town where futures were fragile and trouble had teeth, Miss Syntz was ready to bare her own.
When Hack formed yet another crush on a young woman who came into the Shakey’s where he works, he formulated an elaborate plan to win her affections by having some ne’er do wells associates of his pretend to kidnap her father so that he could rescue him, making her fall in love with with him. The scheme inevitably went wrong (as all of Hack’s schemes do) and the associates are serving a life sentence for the father’s murder while Hack once again was set free on a technicality. He wrote this book based on the experience and it’s not a bad read.
In a period when Hack was in dire financial straits, he tried to make money as a gay prostitute. He quickly discovered that he was as sexually repellent to man as to women.