
Branded

The website of the greatest pulp fiction writer who ever lived








Hack was under the impression that his cover artist Jonny M.’s pug Boris was addicted to reefer for some reason, so he wrote this book as an intervention. When Boris took a dump on the book, Hack was so upset that he spent the next week high on reefer.

This was written in response to a gang of teenagers at the arcade in the Shakey’s Pizza Parlor where Hack works as a janitor taunting him for being a loser. In the novel, the hero drives low-lifes out of town. In real life, the kids put bottle rockets in the toilets Hack was paid to clean.

The urban legend of the stoned babysitter who puts an infant in a microwave oven comes from this 1975 novel, which Hack swears was not only true but that he was the baby in question. But since Hack was born in 1940 and the first microwave oven wasn’t invented until 1946, we suspect that he was stoned on reefer when he “remembered” it.