The website of the greatest pulp fiction writer who ever lived
Hack didn’t learn his lesson from his earlier novel “Mother’s Day” in this misguided sequel, which the court once again found in favor of ABC in its astonishing similarity to the series The Brady Bunch despite Hack’s continued insistence that he has never seen an episode of the show. He was forced to flee to South America and spent a year in hiding as a mercenary in Venezuela before the scandal blew over and he was able to return to the United States.
“Werker’s most depraved work yet. A perverse collection of misspelled sexual scenarios strung together by a loose plot in which he is clearly working out issues from his disturbing upbringing. This ‘novel’ (and I use that word loosely) is nothing but a cry for help from a deeply twisted man.”
– The Tolucan Times
Hack was had a fear of women on their periods dating back to when his first wife would kick him squarely in the scrotum when she was having hers so that he could live through the experience with her.
One night Hack stopped by a hole-in-the-wall tavern and quickly realized that it was a gay bar. This is the story of that night.
This was one of Hack’s infrequent attempts at a conventional romantic love story. As usual, he lost interest halfway through so the last 100 pages are just an angry rant against his abusive father.
A fantasy in which Hack’s various celebrity crushes are trapped in his imagination and have to give in to his disgusting sexual desires. The chapter about TV star Betty White is particularly graphic.
In this second (and last) installment of the Lord Butt Stuffington saga, the pilot is taken captive behind enemy lines and subjected to BDSM torture by a Nazi dominatrix. When Allied soldiers show up to liberate him, he tells the to get lost.
Hack has never made any secret of his being turned on by Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, especially when he watches her take down Donald Trump with such ease. When he wrote this book that depicted her as a stern dominatrix, he was paid a visit by the Secret Service in which (in Hack’s words) a female agent “gave me the full Nancy Pelosi treatment. It was totally worth the two weeks that I spent in ICU.”
Two gorgeous women battle it out to be a mysterious stranger’s partner in anal sex. “Four stars” from Butt Lust Magazine.
Hack met a voiceover actress who would eat the Shakey’s where he worked and he decided to try some sexual experimentation by hiring her to talk in cartoon voices while his then-girlfriend and he made love. It quickly became a fetish and he was unable to achieve an erection without hearing the voice of Betty Boop or Minnie Mouse. The actress and the girlfriend were creeped out by this development and walked out of his life, leaving him to gratify himself by masturbating to Saturday morning cartoons. Hack wasn’t able to overcome his addiction to that fetish until he discovered hardcore BDSM later that year.