The Secret of Pug Pee
Category: The Ocean
Murder on the Queen Mary
The Pirate Queen
Yellow Submarine
Sex Submarine
The Macho Squad
Hack desperately wanted to serve in uniform but when he tried to enlist during the Vietnam war, he was judged to be too psychotic for the military. He was briefly a member of a private militia funded by a high-ranking member of The John Birch Society, but he was drummed out for fragging his commanding officer after he mocked the size of Hack’s tiny genitalia.
Operation Ruth
Everyone told Hack that the Nazis came into power in 1933 and the Titanic sunk in 1912, but he was so obsessed with “Titanic” star Frances Fisher that he didn’t listen and wrote the book in a few hours. It’s a spirited read.
The Caddish Adventures of Captain Lothario
Women are held captive as sex slaves on a pirate ship with lots of scenes of angry anal sex. It’s pretty boilerplate Hack.
Memorial Slay
A demented serial killer shows up at a Memorial Day barbeque and proceeds to murder everyone in attendance. Hack wrote this after going to a similar function at the home of his publisher John Kane and violently attacking his host after being told that they only had turkey burgers.
Titanic II: Ruth’s Story
This was one of Hack’s many attempts to impress “Titanic” star Frances Fisher. As soon as it hit the shelves, his publisher John Kane was inundated with cease-and-desist orders and had to pull all copies from circulation. Undaunted, Hack got Ms. Fisher’s address from a “map of the star’s homes” and had a copy delivered to her. Regrettably, the map was woefully inaccurate and it wound up at the house of a plumber is Los Feliz, but he reported enjoyed the book thoroughly.