When Hack’s cable went out while he was engaging in “social distancing” during the coronavirus epidemic, he freaked out and wrote this thing.
The Cable Went Out
Author: admin
The Leprechaun Who Loved Anal
When most bars closed down during the coronavirus pandemic, Hack wrote this to remind everyone that there were still PLENTY of good ways to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day.
The Last Paper Towels on Earth
Hack wrote this after he went on Amazon.com during the coronavirus panic and saw that they had paper towels “in stock,” so he tried to order some only to get an error that no delivery time was available. To be brutally honest, he lives in a van like an animal and has no need for paper towels but he was still pretty upset.
Roller Disco Fever
Hack wrote this after watching the cult classic “Roller Boogie” with Linda Blair.
Sadly, he watched it in 2010 so sales weren’t exactly through the roof.
The Show Must Go On
Hack’s friend Eddie Frierson (see Mayonnaise is Nonsense) is an actor famous for a one-man show he performs about 16th century baseball player Christy Mathewson. When Frierson snubbed his nose at the coronavirus scare and performed the play in Los Angeles, Hack wrote this novel in tribute.
The Dog Thought it was Hilarious
Hack wrote this after being especially irritated by his cover artist Jonny M. and telling his friend world famous dominatrix Snow Mercy about it. When she told Hack how she would have handled Jonny’s obnoxious arrogance, he based this novel on it.
Jesus is Kinky
This novel was based on Hack’s experiences growing up in the brutally harsh Romanian Catholic Church that his strict father Vlad dragged him to every Sunday. Now an avowed atheist, Hack sometimes reenacts episodes from his youth following a typical church service where he is Vlad and a prostitute with an open mind and a high pain tolerance portrays him.
Coronavirus Nurse
When international superstar Tom Hanks was diagnosed with the coronavirus, Hack sat down and wrote this novel about a promiscuous nurse in the coronavirus ward of a city hospital. While the book was little more than a series of Hack’s typically sick sex fantasies, many reviewers lauded him for understanding far more about the pandemic than the president of the United States.
The Sexiest Moron
Hack wrote this book after lunching with his cover artist Jonny M. and Jonny insisting that everyone in the restaurant (male and female) found him sexually irresistible after taking a single glance at him. Hack was furious when it turned out to be true.
The Return of the Traveling Dominatrix
Hack sometimes vacations with his cover artist Jonny M. and considers him to be the world’s worst traveling companion. When Hack learned that his friend world famous dominatrix Snow Mercy was taking a trip to New Zealand, he wrote this fantasy about Jonny being on the same plane and finally being taken to task for his obnoxious behavior.