The website of the greatest pulp fiction writer who ever lived
After Hack wrote his Edgar Allan Poe rip-off The Tell-Tale Butt, his friend Dave Ritterband mocked “Wow! This one was even better than The Penis and the Pendulum!” Hack was outraged at the slight so he wrote a book with the title to put Ritterband in his place. But his friend was right, The Tell-Tale Butt was much better.
Happy heavenly birthday to the great Edward G. Robinson!
This novel was originally published under the title Christmas Orgy but when Hack was facing a deadline with an evangelical publishing outlet for a Christmas-themed book on spirituality, he changed the nymphomaniacs in the original who came over to trim Jonny’s tree only to find the doors and windows locked when they got there to angels taking the form of his favorite Hollywood celebrities and added a few Bible verses for legitimacy. Surprisingly, the original version was condemned by the Catholic Legion of Decency but the rewritten versions (with all its original debauchery left intact, including a gang bang sequence in the final chapter which was appalling even by Hack’s standards) won an award for Christian Values from the same organization.
This cover was inspired by Hack’s cover artist Jonny M.’s experiences when his home of Los Angeles was facing the scourge of Tropical Storm Hillary. It began when Jonny texted the cover art for The Bunker to a friend the day before, who responded “You’re going to hell.”
A little later when it was pouring rain from Tropical Storm Hilary, Jonny had a vision of an earthquake and having to evacuate his government-assisted housing outside. Shortly afterward, there was an earthquake (no evacuation necessary, though). When he told the same friend about it, they replied “so the earthquake is YOUR fault.”
Jonny made the cover and Hack dashed out a novel around it.
Happy Dinosaurs Day!
Hack wrote this during his brief flirtation with Evangelical Christianity. He later disowned the book even though it was a huge seller in the Bible Belt. It is still required reading in many elementary schools in Arkansas and Kentucky.
And yes, George Harrison’s face was used as the model for Jesus. Nobody noticed at the time.
Happy heavenly birthday to our beloved friend Glenn Simon.
When I had my heart attack, I was rushed to the hospital and placed on a cot in a tiny room where I was CERTAIN that I was about to die. The male nurse who was there sat on a chair next to the cot and wordlessly held my hand. It was great comfort.Happy National Nurses Day. You all have a special place reserved for you in heaven.